My Mastercard Commercial

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Sleeping in without a bathroom break: lightly trying.

Being left home alone on a bright sunny day: very annoying.

Left yet again that evening: beyond boring.*

Midnight rendezvous with Maggie: priceless

"There are some things that money can't buy. For everything else, there's Mastercard." 

Exercising my right of free speech here. Nader got away with it, so I should be fine.

* collateral damage: 1 cocktail napkin

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